Wednesday, September 15, 2010

MPT15--Final Piggy Tale (After High School)

This is the 15th in a series of 15 posts recounting my childhood. (To see parts 1 through 14, click the label "MPT" in my sidebar.) Today is the final post in this series, after high school. I want to give a basic synopsis of "what happened next?" without boring you to death or spoiling my future adventures recording my Young Adult Tales. Then I'll try to wrap up some of the themes I mentioned over the course of the last 14 weeks.

And Then What Happened?
In the fall of 1992, I headed off to college. I'm not good with new things or making new friends, the whole thing was full of anxiety, but I became friends with a girl in my dorm, Alison, and a girl in my American Studies class, Joanna, and then adopted all of Joanna's friends and I was off and running.
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College rocked! It was the best 4 years of my life (at least before my husband and kids entered the picture). I had a good balance of work and play. I studied hard but spent plenty of time with friends and Joanna was a natural leader and organizer and she found us lots of (non-alcoholic) fun things to do.
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I continued to be very ambitious. I had decided in high school that I wanted to be a lawyer--clearly that came from watching "L.A. Law" and not any realistic grasp of what lawyers do. My sophomore year in college, in a discussion with my advisor, I realized I could combine my interest in Native Americans and in law and I could practice, drumroll please, Native American Law. {That's where you work for a tribe or a law firm or an organization like NARF on behalf of tribes and their legal issues, often treaty rights, land use etc.} I had had no idea there was such a thing and how great would that be? So that became my goal.
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Senior year I took the LSAT and applied to law schools, again I surprised myself getting into some top schools. Then I headed off to law school. This is getting long-winded, sorry.
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I met my husband in law school. We were in the same section and started off as friends. He became part of the group of us that went to church together on Sundays (we're both Catholic). Then during second semester, I was shopping with some friends and they said "like {hubby}" and I thought, hmmm you know he did tap me with a pencil the other day. Sorry, this isn't making a lot of sense, you kind of had to be there. Anyway, so I started looking at him with fresh eyes and realized, yeah he's pretty cool. So we started flirting and then double-dating with my shopping friends and then we had our first real date and the rest is history.
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Meanwhile, law school sucked!!! It was seven kinds of miserable.
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My first summer, I interned on an Indian reservation in South Dakota. My boss was the Attorney General for the tribe (a member of the tribe and a Harvard Law grad) and he was a sexist pig. He took the male interns horseback riding and gave us female interns secretarial work. Bad experience.
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My second summer, I was disillusioned by Indian Law and in need of money for our upcoming wedding, so I took a job as a summer associate at a law firm in Southern California (while my fiance worked for a firm in LA). I made lots of money but it was another miserable experience.
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We got married in our last semester of law school (crazy, I know). Then we moved to Northern California to study for the Bar Exam. Then we moved to LA where Hubby had a job. I had not bothered to job-hunt at the end of the school year because again I was disillusioned and getting married and figured I'd get a job once we moved to LA.
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Enter... health crisis. Beginning in the second semester of law school, I started having frequent diarrhea. Symptoms got progressively worse until we got to LA and I didn't want to leave the house, my symptoms were so constant. That's when I finally went to a doctor. I was diagnosed with both IBS and Depression. {In hindsight, the depression symptoms began my second year of law school but I thought I was just burnt out from a very busy school year and a bad reservation experience.} Medication helped the IBS but even though I improved, I wasn't able to work.
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So I was a lazy bum for several years. Meanwhile, we moved to Phoenix and then DC and then back to Phoenix, following Hubby's career as it meandered. My health was up and down (trying this medication and that) and I started thinking about having kids. In 2004, after we moved back to Phoenix, we conceived our son L and I became (instead of a lazy bum) a SAHM.
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Sometimes life doesn't go as planned! I had been a smart ambitious girl who never wanted children. But the IBS derailed my career ambitions and led me to my current path as a mom. I believe that was God's plan and that now I'm on the right path. I hope! So that's where I am now, a full-time mom of two. I plan to work after the kids are in school full-time, but it won't be in law. I can't handle that stress or lifestyle. I don't know what the future holds.
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Themes
Boys
By the end of high school and early college, I was obsessed with getting a boyfriend. I'd never had one and really really wanted a boy to like me. I continued to have crush after unrequited crush--it was incredibly annoying. I drove my friends crazy as I obsessed after this boy or that. Sheesh!
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The summer between sophomore and junior years in college, I went to France for a 6-week program. I had been wondering if I even knew how to flirt, well I went flirting-crazy while in France! I flirted with every boy in the program (in hindsight, that may have been embarrassing, but at the time it was fun). ;-)
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I guess my flirting paid off because the following fall, a guy I'd met in the program Asked Me Out. On A Date! Yippee! After some awkward early dates, he became my BOYFRIEND. Woohoo! We had a lovely little 5-month relationship then he dumped me and then we had an ugly post-break-up mess (involving that new technology called email). It broke my heart.
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The break-up was at the end of junior year and I entered senior year swearing off men. Finally I'd had a boyfriend, I knew I was capable/worthy of being loved, I didn't need the headache of crushes and flirting.
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That was great, it was freeing. Then I started law school and I looked around and saw cute guys everywhere and I went into full-on flirt mode. Haha, I guess I was recovered from my heartbreak. But I was scarred. On the eve of my first date with hubby, I almost cancelled. I thought "these things never work out, we'll just break up, it's awful" etc. Then I thought {hubby} makes me smile, so I kept our date and it was an amazing night and here we are 14 years later!
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Friends
I had a wonderful group of friends in college. As I mentioned, I adopted Joanna's friends, plus Alison from my hall, and we had a ton of fun. From high school, I've remained close with two people, Karen and Amy, they were both Maids of Honor in my wedding. Shirley has remained my closest friend from college, but I keep up with others through facebook.
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I still struggle with making friends. I love all these old friends, but we are spread throughout the country. I have a tough time making and keeping friends in Phoenix. But I'm married to my best friend, so that's what matters, right?!
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Singing
I sang throughout college. I auditioned for the big and small choirs (Chorale and Chamber Singers) at the beginning of freshman year and I couldn't believe it when I made both! Chamber Singers was about the size of my high school's Swing Choir, that I hadn't qualified for, so that felt awesome! I sang in Chorale and Chamber Singers all 4 years. I loved our director, Mr. Wright.
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Meanwhile, a capella was huge at my school. Freshman year I tried out for the girls group and didn't make it. Junior year I tried out for both coed groups and didn't make those either.
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Finally, in law school I joined an a capella group. Woohoo! Yes, even law school had an a capella group. I auditioned the fall of my first year and didn't make it. Then I heard through a friend who was in the group that they were looking for altos the second semester so I auditioned again and made it. That was fun. We did singing telegrams on Valentine's Day around the law school. We did a spring concert and then sang at graduation. However, by the performances toward the end of the year, my IBS was really bad (I look back and thank God for getting me through the performances without incident) and I knew I couldn't continue with the group. So I quit and I've never sung in a choir again.
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But you can't stop me from singing--around my house and in the car, even in the grocery store!
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Did I forget anything? Was there a loose end I didn't tie up? Let me know in the comments!
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So ends my Piggy Tales journey. Read more over at Mommy's Piggy Tales and thanks so much for coming on this journey with me! (And if you want to keep up with my current adventures as an overwhelmed mom of two, now that you know how I got here, you can follow my blog!) God bless!

7 comments:

Janette@Janette's Sage said...

You have had such a full life!! So interesting! So enjoyed reading your mommy piggy tales...you made it. And yes, life doesn't turn out how we imagined...but it usually is better.
What a fascinating life!! Enjoyed!!!

Ginny Marie said...

I'm sorry I missed your MPT posts! I'll have to go back and read more! My sister was just diagnosed with IBS, and I know how disruptive it can be.

I hope you're up for writing more about your "young adult years!" I'm guest hosting the link-up at Mommy's Piggy Tales on Mondays, starting October 11. I'd be thrilled if you joined us! Just email me at lemondroppie(at)gmail(dot)com to sign up!

Judy said...

You just might have been insane to get married during law school! My husband is in his second year and I just can't imagine trying to plan a wedding while going to law school!

It's amazing the way God works in our lives...trials turning into blessings and such!

Thanks for stopping by my blog! Have a great weekend!

thecoolmom said...

Life does have a way of taking us somewhere we didn't think of going. I had planned to be a free-spirited professional musician, but ended up a homeschooling mom of 10. LOL And I wouldn't have it any other way. I can't imagine getting married while finished law school. I hope the insanity you were suffering from then was the temporary kind. :D

SpitFire said...

Hey! I loved your wrap-up. I plan to go back and read your posts more thoroughly...I'm sorry I wasn't a more attentive group leader. Life is a pain in the butt sometimes, lol.

I had a supervisor when I was in the military, who had IBS. Poor guy would vanish for loooong periods of time to the bathroom. I'm glad you got through your performances without incident!! I'm glad we got put in the same group, as I've loved reading about your adventures, and our shared love of singing.

Mom2three said...

wow! You had a busy and ambitious life. I had no idea that law schools had choir or things like that! Isn't it funny how things change and we end up doing something totally different than we planned. I've enjoyed reading your piggy tales. I'm sorry that you've suffered from IBS.

Jenny said...

My sister's sister-in-law just got married, amidst finishing law school and taking the bar. I started planning for my wedding while we were student teaching, but I don't think that was quite as much work. :) I had no idea law school had extracurricular activities. I think it's really, really hard to make "real" friendships at this point in my life, too. :( I've enjoyed reading all of your tales!